a shell without a soul.

my condition is worsening. i can no longer control my situation. i met sunbear again today. it made me more depressed. i could not even bring myself to look at myself, which explains my mismatched ensemble. my head throbs and my heart sinking, sank. i need to find some relieves in my miserable routines. that's how i got into a three-hours session of pool yesterday despite having played really badly. strange that skin on hands is peeling. with everyone away, the desire to fade away is deepened. i am overwhelmed by anxiety over nothing. i am dying. my shell will be here for all to see but i am not here anymore. i do not have a world to go to. i will roam. i am a nomad. i leave.